In the 801 a lot of crazy things go down. One of the craziest is an activity known as “water ballooning”. You could catch anyone water balloon. A nerd, jock, normal chick, hair school chick, emo, indi, poly, etc… It is our form of the drive by and it is real. There is a lot of risk involved though. You could get caught by the police, caught by the people you hit, or worst of all, caught by your feelings.
Caught by your feelings is bad. When you are water ballooning you generally drive by people and throw the balloons. You rarely know who you are hitting. Every once in a while you might get an old person, a pregnant woman, or a handicapped kid. That is when your feelings catch up with you. Your conscience starts saying, “T-Quizzle, how could you do this? You just hit a defenseless person.” The soft hearted retire when this happens. The 801 thugs push through. They harden their hearts. They stop for a minute, regroup and head back out, water ballooning everything in sight.
As you know, I have a learned a lot of lessons from a lot of people in the 801. I want to thank all the OG’s from the 801 for taking me under their wings and making me into the person I am today. In the world of water ballooning the truest OG was/is Kia Kamauu. Kia is a Polynesian kid from Nor Cal. (A special thanks from all the playa’s from other area codes that have brought their culture to the 801 and made it what it is today.) Unlike others, Kia feared nothing when it came to balloonin’. If someone caught him he simply beat them up. This made him the most dangerous kind of ballooner!
My first time balloonin’ with Kia was one of the top four greatest experiences of my life. It ranks up there with birth, graduation and winning the team 007 tourney on Nintendo 64 in high school. It was summer 2002. Kia was rockin’ a silver mini-van with sliding doors. This provided the greatest opportunity for accuracy in balloonin’. You could almost get a full arm motion.
After cappin’ a few unsuspecting clowns with army grenade balloons, Kia made a risky move. He started a slow roll through the campus of BYU. I couldn’t believe it. My heart pounded as he turned right to roll the street in front of the WILK. I had never seen anything like this street. It was a water ballooning bliss. First dates everywhere. Guys who finally got the courage to ask out chicks and were willing to do anything to show their manhood.
Kia picked out one couple that walked innocently down the sidewalk. This was a big mistake. In the 801 this is what we call “straight slippin”. You gotta always be watching your back. As we approached the couple we took aim. All at once five balloons were fired. Three connected and exploded. Immediately I screamed, “Go, lets go.” Kia slowed down. My heart beat tripled as my head flooded with questions. Was the car dying? Did a tire pop? Did someone fall out of the car? Why were we slowing down?
I am embarrassed to admit my inexperience. It was all part of the master plan. The guy, in anger, began a full sprint after the van. I slammed the sliding door in fear. As he started his sprint Kia slowed down again. He was now going 10 miles an hour. The kid continued to gain on the van. Finally the kid was a few feet from the back of the van. Then it happened. Just as the kid reached the back of the car Kia slammed on the brakes. I heard a thud and watched the kid fall to the ground. Everyone in the car started laughing. That fool got laid down. I respect him for trying to keep it real. The problem is, when you try to keep it real with a crew that is more real than you, you gonna get played. Happens all the time in these streets.
This was one of the most eye opening experiences of my life. How could I have been so scared? How could I have been so soft? To this day I have never made the same mistake again. I will straight slow roll a 5.0 and drop forty balloons at once on a pig. Do you know what happens to my heart? It SLOWS DOWN! I am so relaxed I might as well be on the lazy river at Seven Peaks. Thanks to my homeboy Kia for teaching me such a valuable lesson.
